Taken by Suprise: Teenage Mum

Schwanger unter 18

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How Can I Make This Work? What Do I Need to Keep in Mind?

🙎‍♀️ Pregnant Teen: Am I too young for a baby? Take the Quiz

  • Becoming pregnant as a teenager can bring one’s world to a standstill and throw one’s plans into disarray. Initially, many girls are unsure about how to make things work and may also consider abortion.
  • It may also help to imagine what life as a mother could look like. Because the following questions are also on the table: how can things be worked out if I want to keep the baby? What kinds of practical support, childcare, and financial assistance are available?
  • In the UK, no distinction is made between adolescent parents and adults. Depending on your situation, you have several options on where to live with your baby to ensure they receive the best care possible while you complete your schooling.

Young and Pregnant: What Are My Options? — Quiz

Still in school, college, training, new job, gap year… and pregnant? Wondering whether you might be too young? Answer three multiple-choice questions and receive an immediate professional evaluation. Know your options and receive support and tips on discerning a way forward!

My Situation:

Teen Mum

You probably had not planned on becoming a mum so early in life. Many thoughts are likely running through your head in this new and unfamiliar situation, centred on the question, 'How can I make this work?'

  • Do I even have the right to assume full responsibility for this baby since I am still underage?
  • Where do I live with the baby? Do I have to move out from home?
  • What about my education?
  • How can I afford a baby?

This article aims to provide you with all the information and resources you will need as a teenage parent.

Custody Rights of Minor Parents

The custody laws in the United Kingdom govern your parental responsibilities.

If you are under 18 and have a baby, you have the same legal rights and responsibilities towards the child as any other mother.

📘 Read Custody- and Visitation Rights for more in-depth information.

Living with my Baby: What are my Options?

The considerations concerning your baby's care include where you and your baby will live. You have several options.

1. Living with Your Parents

Some young mothers prefer to live with their parents after the birth of their child. This is a definite possibility if you and your parents agree.

2. Living in Your Own Flat — Alone or with the Baby's Father

If living with your parents is not an option, e.g. because there is not enough room for all of you, you can also choose to move out. Sometimes, renting your own place requires your guardian's signature. You may also need your parents' approval before moving in with your boyfriend.

3. Housing Arranged by Social Services

If you and your parents cannot agree on a suitable place for you to live, you can contact social services. Your government office can help you find the best option for you and your baby.

If your need is immediate, you may be given a spot in a youth shelter for the first week or two until a more permanent solution can be found.

Supported living can mean one of two things:

  1. Maternity group home — You would be housed with other young mums and a social worker in a group setting.
  2. Independent living — You are given a flat where a social worker comes to check on you and provide support.

Find living options for underage parents in your area!

  • As a teen mum, you would probably be too young to get privately rented or council housing unless your parents sign for you. If you have housing needs, contact your nearest Citizens Advice.
  • Shelter is a national homeless and housing charity
  • Family Lives will advise you on more places to find support in your area.

What about School or Vocational Training?

Perhaps you are already thinking about the implications of this pregnancy on your everyday life — will you be able to complete school on time? You are probably already trying to figure out what to say to your teachers and friends at school.

Your guidance counsellor can help you create a learning plan that includes taking time off for the baby. Bring a friend or family member if you would rather not have this meeting alone. Usually, pregnant teens can continue attending school — with a possible baby break — and still obtain their GCSEs.

⚠️ Your teacher or guidance counsellor may not show any reaction at first, which can feel unnerving. School staff is trained to be neutral until they know how you have decided to proceed.

You may like:

Here you can find out more about schooling options for underage parents:

Childcare While You Are at School

One of your greatest concerns probably has to do with childcare. This can be crucial if you want to continue your education. After all, your qualification is still important, even after having a baby.

You have several options to choose from:

Grandparents' leave:

The UK has regulated timeframes during which grandparents, i.e. his or your parents, can take time off work to care for their grandbaby. Up to 18 weeks of unpaid/paid leave may be granted, depending on the employer.

Paternity Leave:

The baby's father may be able to take parental leave to take care of the baby.

Paid Childcare:

  • If you live in a maternity home or boarding school for mothers, your baby will be cared for by paid workers while you are attending classes.
  • You can also choose to entrust your child to a nursery while you are at school or work.

⚠️ Wondering how to pay for childcare? See the information below to find out more.

If you find it difficult to arrange childcare or if you would prefer to stay at home. with the baby, online schooling may be a solution. This would make it possible for you to take classes while your baby sleeps.

Financial Support: What are we going to live on?

As a minor, you may still be in secondary school or vocational training and not have a stable income.

ℹ️ Refer to our Financial Support page to find out what mums of any age can apply for.

If your parents are claiming Child Tax Credit, your baby can be added to the claim.

  • Sure Start Maternity Grant of £500
  • Housing Benefit: if your parents are receiving housing benefit, your baby can be added to the claim.
  • Healthy Start provides vouchers for pregnant teens which can be used for milk, fruit, vegetables and vitamins.
  • Education Maintanance Allowance for teen mums in school (NI, Scotland, Wales)
  • Bursary Fund for teen mums in school (England)
  • If you are not living with the child’s other parent, the Child Maintenance Service can arrange for them to pay maintenance.
  • Care to Learn weekly payments for teen mums taking a publicly funded course, such as sixth form.
  • The Childcare Grant is available to full-time students. To qualify, you must have a dependent child or children in registered or approved childcare. If you qualify, you can receive up to 85% of your childcare costs.

Practical Support for Teen Mums

A baby brings a whole new set of challenges. Sometimes, the family or the baby's father are there to master them with you. Yet, this may not be the case in your situation, e.g. because your parents work full-time.

The following practical support is offered to teen mums in your area:

Where Do I Go from Here? How Do I Talk to My Parents?

Your brain is probably on information overload after reading this article! There is no need to do everything at once. Take it one step at a time!

Perhaps you are having a hard time identifying whom to confide in. You may be nervous about how they would react to your news. You may also be anxious about your parents' reaction and wonder how to tell them.

Parents usually respond more positively than expected. Here are a few tips that might help you prepare for an upcoming conversation.

How Do I Tell My Parents I am Pregnant?

  • 👥 Get back-up: this could be a family friend, an aunt or your godmother. Think of someone who is liked by your parents and supports you.
  • 🤔 Think about what you want to say and how you want to convey it. Notes can help you keep your train of thought and stick to what is essential to you.
  • 💚 Take the courage to share your thoughts and feelings. You can be frank that this is a difficult subject to broach, but it is important enough to take the risk.
  • 🤝 Ask your parents for support! Their life experience is an invaluable resource.
  • 👩‍🦰/👱‍♂️ You may find it easier to talk to one parent at a time.
  • 🕰 Give your parents time to take in the news and consider viable options for you.

We want to be there for you! profemina specialises in providing free counselling to pregnant women in a judgement-free setting. Our goal is to support you as you discover the path that works for you. Why not give it a try?

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