How Can I Make This Work? What Do I Need to Keep in Mind?
🙎♀️ Pregnant teen — am I too young for a baby? Take the Quiz
- Becoming pregnant as a teenager can bring one’s world to a standstill and throw one’s plans into disarray. Initially, many girls are unsure about how to make things work and may also consider abortion.
- It may also help to imagine what life as a mother could look like. Because the following questions are also on the table: How can things be worked out if I want to keep the baby? What kinds of practical support, childcare, and financial assistance are available?
- Most countries make little or no distinction between adolescent parents and adults. Sometimes, the grandparents have guardianship of the baby until the mother turns 18. Depending on your situation, you have several options on where to live with your baby to ensure they receive the best care possible while you complete your schooling.
Young and Pregnant: What Are My Options? — Quiz
Still in school, college, training, new job, gap year… and pregnant? Wondering whether you might be too young? Answer three multiple-choice questions and receive an immediate professional evaluation. Know your options and receive support and tips on discerning a way forward!
Teen Mom
You probably had not planned on becoming a mom so early in life. Many thoughts are likely running through your head in this new and unfamiliar situation, centered on the question, "How can I make this work?"
- Do I even have the right to assume full responsibility for this baby since I am still underage? Or do my parents have guardianship?
- Where do I live with the baby? Do I have to move out?
- What about my education?
- What kind of support can I apply for?
This article aims to provide you with all the information and resources you will need as a teenage parent.
Custody Rights of Minor Parents — International Overview
Your country's custody laws govern your parental responsibilities.
Find your region below to discover your custody rights as an underage parent!
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United States of America:
- Until you are 18, you make the decisions for your baby, but your parents make decisions regarding your care.
- Laws differ slightly from state to state. Twelve states give teen moms all custody rights. Most others allow teen mothers to decide where the baby lives, whether to place their child for adoption, how to raise their child and general healthcare decisions for their baby. Authorizing surgery often requires adult involvement.
- Emancipation gives a teen adult status with full custody rights in all states. This can be achieved by making a petition at the local court or by marriage.
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United Kingdom:
- If you are under 18 and have a baby, you have the same legal rights and responsibilities towards the child as any other mother.
Ireland:
- You are automatically the child's legal guardian from birth and have full custody of your child, even before you are 18.
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Australia:
- You have full custody of your child, even before you turn 18. You have full rights and responsibilities for your child unless you are not coping. In that situation, a case worker will step in to provide guidance to you.
- For more specific questions, consult Youth Law Australia.
- You have full custody of your child, even before you turn 18. You have full rights and responsibilities for your child unless you are not coping. In that situation, a case worker will step in to provide guidance to you.
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Canada:
- Underage parents have the same rights and responsibilities toward their children as adults.
South Africa:
- Your legal guardian is also the baby's guardian until you turn 18. This is usually your mother.
New Zealand:
- Underage parents have the same rights and responsibilities toward their children as adults.
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Austria:
- See our Austrian pages:
Germany:
- See our German pages:
Italy:
- See our Italian pages:
Portugal:
- See our Portuguese pages:
Switzerland:
- See our Swiss pages:
Living with My Baby: What Are My Options?
The considerations concerning your baby's care include where you and your baby will live. You have several options:
1. Living with Your Parents
Some young mothers prefer to live with their parents after the birth of their child. This is a definite possibility if you and your parents agree.
2. Living in Your Own Apartment — Alone or with the Baby's Dad
If living with your parents is not an option, e.g., because there is not enough room for all of you, you can also choose to move out. Sometimes, renting your own place requires your guardian's signature. You may also need your parents' approval before moving in with your boyfriend.
3. Housing Arranged by Social Services
If you and your parents cannot agree on a suitable place for you to live, you can contact social services. Your government office can help you find the best option for you and your baby.
If your need is immediate, you may be given a spot in a youth shelter for the first week or two until a more permanent solution can be found.
Supported living can mean one of two things:
- Maternity group home — You would be housed with other young moms and a social worker in a group setting
- Independent living — You are given an apartment where a social worker comes to check on you and provide support.
Click on your region to find living options for underage parents near you!
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United States of America:
- Share the cost of living and babysitting with another single mom by using Shareabode.
- If you are in foster care, appeal to DSS or your guardian to be housed with your baby.
- Good Counsel Homes
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United Kingdom:
- As a teen mom, you would probably be too young to get privately rented or council housing unless your parents sign for you. If you have housing needs, contact your nearest Citizens Advice.
- Shelter is a national homeless and housing charity
- Family Lives will advise you on more places to find support in your area.
Ireland:
- Housing for homeless youth:
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Australia:
- Share housing costs with other single moms using Shareabode
- Karinya House in Canberra
- Catholic Care Youth Housing in Hornsby, Woy Woy, Ryde, and Ku-ring-gai
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South Africa:
- Youth Shelters in Cape Town
- Acres of Love in Johannesburg and Cape Town
- The House Group in Johannesburg
- Girls and Boys Town
New Zealand:
Canada:
- Share the cost of living and babysitting with another single mom by using Shareabode.
- Apply for assistance with Social Development. They will run a social assessment of your parental home before approving your application.
- Supportive Teen Parent Housing
- Jessie's Housing Support helps you find a place to stay.
What about School or Job Training?
Perhaps you are already thinking about the implications of this pregnancy on your everyday life — will you be able to graduate on time? You are probably already trying to figure out what to say to your teachers and friends at school.
Your guidance counselor can help you create a learning plan that includes taking time off for the baby. Bring a friend or family member if you would rather not have this meeting alone. Usually, pregnant teens can continue attending school — with a possible baby break — and graduate.
⚠️ Your teacher or guidance counselor may not show any reaction at first, which can feel unnerving. School staff is trained to be neutral until they know how you have decided to proceed.
You may like:
- Pregnant and No One Congratulates
- Pregnant during Job-Training
- Laws which Protect You against Discrimination
- Taking a Baby Break — Laws and Regulations
- Accommodations at School
Click on your region to find out schooling options for underage parents:
-
United States of America:
- You have the right to remain in school.
- Do a web search if you prefer to visit an alternative high school for pregnant teens in your area.
- You also have the option of completing school online. A web search will reveal free online schools in your state.
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United Kingdom:
- Moat House School in Stockport.
- Academy 21: Online School for Pregnant Students
Ireland:
- Once you turn 16, you have no obligation to stay in school, but you have the right to complete your schooling, even while pregnant or as a young mother. You can go to school or take part in the Home Tuition Scheme.
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Australia:
- If you are pregnant or are parenting while you are still at school, you have the right to complete your schooling. You can stay at your local school or study at an external institution such as TAFE.
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South Africa:
- You have the right to remain in school.
New Zealand:
- Find a list of teen parent schools here.
Canada:
- Once you turn 16, you have no obligation to stay in school, but you have the right to complete your schooling, even while pregnant or as a young mother.
- You may find it easier to attend a boarding school for young mothers since your baby's needs are being met while you are in class.
- Louise Dean School in Calgary
- Terra Centre in Edmonton
Childcare While You Are at School
One of your greatest concerns probably has to do with childcare. This can be crucial if you want to continue your education. After all, your degree is still important, even after having a baby.
You may have several options, depending on where you live:
Grandparents' Leave:
Some countries have regulated timeframes during which grandparents, i.e., his or your parents, can take time off work to care for their grandbaby:
- South Africa — 3 days
- Australia — 12 months of Unpaid Carer's Leave
- UK — 18 weeks of unpaid/paid leave, depending on your employer
- Canada — 8 weeks of Family Caregiver Leave
Paternity Leave:
The baby's father may be able to take parental leave to take care of the baby.
- For more information, go to Parental Leave.
Paid Childcare:
- If you live in a maternity home or boarding school for mothers, your baby will be cared for by paid workers while you are in class.
- You can also entrust your child to a daycare center or babysitter while you are at school or work.
⚠️ Wondering how to pay for childcare? Click on your region in the chart below.
If you find it difficult to arrange childcare or if you would prefer to stay at home with the baby, online schooling may be a solution. This would allow you to take classes while your baby sleeps.
Financial Support: What Are We Going to Live On?
As a minor, you may still be in high school or job training and not have a stable income.
ℹ️ Refer to our Financial Support page to find out what moms of any age can apply for.
Click on your region to find out whether extra support is offered to teen moms in your area:
-
United States of America:
- According to the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Act of 1996, the baby’s paternal grandparents may have to pay child support if the father is a minor.
- TANF Cash Assistance is available while you are in school or job training.
-
United Kingdom:
- If your parents are claiming Child Tax Credit, your baby can be added to the claim.
- Sure Start Maternity Grant of £500
- Housing Benefit: If your parents are receiving housing benefit, your baby can be added to the claim.
- Healthy Start provides vouchers for pregnant teens which can be used for milk, fruit, vegetables, and vitamins.
- Education Maintanance Allowance for teen moms in school (NI, Scotland, Wales)
- Bursary Fund for teen moms in school (England)
- If you are not living with the child’s other parent, the Child Maintenance Service can arrange for them to pay maintenance.
- Care to Learn weekly payments for teen moms taking a publicly funded course, such as sixth form.
- The Childcare Grant is available to full-time students. To qualify, you must have a dependent child or children in registered or approved childcare. If you qualify, you can receive up to 85% of your childcare costs.
Ireland:
- All benefits are listed on our Benefits Page.
- Income Assessed Subsidy : If you are in school and earning less than €26.000 per year, you will be entitled to up to 45 hours of subsidized childcare per week at €5.10 per hour.
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Australia:
- Youth Allowance: Financial aid for under 24-year-olds in education or under 21-year-olds looking for work.
- Centrelink – Child Care Rebate assists parents or guardians with your out-of-pocket expenses for approved childcare if you are studying
- Centrelink – Jobs, Education and Training Child Care Fee Assistance (JETCCFA) provides extra help with the cost of childcare for student parents.
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South Africa:
- There are no additional financial aid options for underage moms.
New Zealand:
- The Young Parent payment is for moms aged 16-19 who wish to continue their education.
- Guaranteed Childcare Assistance payment (GCAP) is for parents under 20 to help with the cost of childcare for up to $300 per week.
Canada:
- Youth Policy provides counseling, career advice, and financial assistance above the standard rate.
- You will be asked to sign a Statement of Non-Support when applying for financial aid from the government. They will seek support from your parent(s). You are still elligible for support if you refuse to sign.
- Young Parent Program: help with childcare for under 25-year-olds while they complete high school — up to $1,500 per month to cover childcare.
Practical Support for Teen Moms
A baby brings a whole new set of challenges. Sometimes, the family or the baby's father are there to master them with you. Yet, this may not be the case in your situation, e.g., because your parents work full-time.
- 💪 Find practical support for all moms by clicking on Organizations Near Me.
Click on your region to find out whether practical support is offered to teen moms in your area:
-
United States of America:
- Young Lives is the teen mom branch of Young Life. They have group meetings and retreats in many locations.
- Become part of an Embrace Grace group for single moms and have them throw you a baby shower.
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United Kingdom:
- Home Start group meetings and individualized support for young moms
- Join a forum for young parents by Family Lives
- Young Lives group and camp for parenting teens in Tayside, Scotland
Ireland:
- Teen Parent Support Program: support, information, and advocacy until the child turns 2.
-
Australia:
- Contact your local community centre or local council to find out about support groups for young parents. These groups can provide emotional and practical support and are a place to learn parenting hacks.
- Join or start a playgroup: call 1800 171 882
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South Africa:
- Young Mom Support
- LifeLine Pregnancy Support for Teenagers: 033-342-4447
- Meet other pregnant students and get free baby gear at Embrace Grace.
- Teen Parenting Programme for parenting skills in Wynberg
- Open Door Programme for learning life skills in Mpumalanga
- Teen Moms youth development club in George
New Zealand:
- Thrive Teen Parent Support Trust helps you face challenges including parenting, finances, schooling and finding a place to live.
Canada:
- Canada Prenatal Nutrition Program teaches teen moms how and what to cook.
- Nobody's Perfect Program: community-based parenting program for young parents.
- Find peer support and a baby shower at Embrace Grace.
Where Do I Go from Here? How Do I Talk to My Parents?
Your brain is probably on information overload after reading this article! There is no need to do everything at once. Take it one step at a time!
Perhaps you are having a hard time identifying whom to confide in. You may be nervous about how they would react to your news. You may also be anxious about your parents' reaction and wonder how to tell them.
Parents usually respond more positively than expected. Here are a few tips that might help you prepare for an upcoming conversation.
How Do I Tell My Parents I Am Pregnant?
👥 Get back-up: This could be a family friend, an aunt, or your godmother. Think of someone who is liked by your parents and has your back.
🤔 Think about what you want to say and how you want to convey it. Notes can help you keep your train of thought and stick to what is essential to you.
💚 Take the courage to share your thoughts and feelings. You can be frank that this is a difficult subject to broach, but it is important enough to take the risk.
🤝 Ask your parents for support! Their life experience is an invaluable resource.
👩🦰/👱♂️ You may find it easier to talk to one parent at a time.
🕰 Give your parents time to take in the news and consider viable options for you.
We want to be there for you! Profemina specializes in providing free counseling to pregnant women in a judgment-free setting. We aim to support you as you discover the path that works for you. Why not give it a try?
- 💗 Could I be pregnant without penetration?
- 🙎🏻♂️Acknowledging Paternity — How to navigate issues with the dad
- 🍷🚬 Tobacco/alcohol/drugs: Has my consumption hurt the baby?
- 🏥 Abortion methods — What do I need to know?
- 🧑⚕️ (Suspecting a) pregnancy — How soon to see a doctor?
