Can I Be Pressured into Getting an Abortion?
- 'Choice' and 'autonomy' are central ideas when considering abortion. However, many abortions occur because a woman feels she has no choice - either because of her circumstances or because she has been coerced by her partner, family, friends, employers, university or medical professionals.
- No woman should ever have to endure a termination against her wishes. Forced abortions are disempowering and can lead to significant trauma. It is your body and your choice!
-
What is Abortion Coercion?
Is Forced Abortion Common?
Is Coerced Abortion Legal?
Am I Experiencing Intimate Partner Violence Regarding Abortion?
He Wants Me to Have an Abortion
My Parents Don't Want Me to Keep the Baby
Why Do Some Parents Respond that Way?
Abortion Coercion — If It Is Happening to You Right Now
Like all abuse, it’s used to gain power and control over you so that you would do something you are confused or unsure about. This type of intimate partner violence can also be practiced by friends or family and is hard to pinpoint because it often uses measures other than physical violence, such as:
- emotional manipulation or blackmail
- embarrassment
- threats of, or actual infidelity
- causing financial problems
- harassment
- withholding, or taking important legal documents
- isolation from friends or family
Is Forced Abortion Common?
Forced abortion is not discussed much in the media or other high-profile platforms, so it is easy to believe you are on your own. You are not, and it is not your fault!
Statistics differ from country to country, but they clearly show that many women feel undersupported in protecting their sexual autonomy. A 2022 BBC poll found that 15% of British women had experienced pressure or coercion to have an abortion that they did not want.
Is Coerced Abortion Legal?
In the UK, legal protection against coercive abortion is founded on common law and the principle of bodily autonomy. These laws were installed to protect women since forcing a woman to have an abortion can be emotionally damaging to her.
Doctors are cautious to ensure the women are 'willingly and freely' consenting to an abortion. They face jail if they provide abortions without the mother’s explicit consent.
The Domestic Abuse (Scotland) Act of 2018 recognises that pressure and coercion can take many forms, be subtle or blatant, and involve emotional, psychological, financial and even physical threats, so women's freedom of action is restricted. When women report being victims of coerced abortion, they have recourse to a justice system that supports them.
Am I Experiencing Intimate Partner Violence Regarding Abortion?
If any of these apply, you may be experiencing abortion coercion::
- I feel rushed.
- I feel more confused and torn after talking with others.
- I am being told that abortion will solve everything.
- I am being told that keeping the baby would ruin my life.
- I feel as though I have zero say; there is no option for me to keep the baby.
- Others are directing my decision-making.
- If I did not want an abortion, I could not get anyone to agree.
- I feel guilty for wanting to keep the baby.
- My partner said he wanted/needed me to have an abortion.
- My partner/parent said they would leave me/kick me out if I did not have an abortion.
- Someone said they would hurt themselves/me if I didn't have an abortion.
Abortion coercion is an intrusion into your autonomy. This would stifle your ability to make a decision consistent with your core values and convictions.
✅ Go to How Do I Make a Good Decision for tips on determining the path that is right for you.
It can be challenging to withstand manipulative pressure. Your growing awareness of the unlawfulness of such behaviour can help you expose the deception. Pinpointing where you disagree can help you seek justice and a refuge from oppression. You may also feel unsure about what you want, causing you to wonder which path you want to take. Use our tests to discern your innermost desires.
- ⚖️ Should I get an abortion? Take the Abortion Test (with immediate evaluation).
- 🏠 Looking for a place to go? Supported Living Near Me
He Wants Me to Have an Abortion
When a pregnancy is unexpected, the baby's father sometimes pressures toward termination, e.g. by
- threatening to withhold support.
- asking her to prove her love by having an abortion.
- driving her to the abortion clinic.
- threatening to end the relationship.
- threatening to violate her privacy, e.g. using her nude photos against her.
- threatening to harm himself or her.
👱🏽♂️Take the test: He Does Not Want the Baby, to determine which steps to take.
Your partner's demeanour may be very different from your first encounter. It may be hard to imagine right now, but experience shows that, in time, many men usually adjust to the new situation. In retrospect, many men are glad that she kept the course despite his negative reaction.
For more tips on how to respond to this situation, go to:
➡️ How Do I Tell Him that I Want to Keep the Baby?
➡️ Relationship Status: It's Complicated
👊🏼 ⛔️ Is he threatening to harm you? Remove yourself from his presence as soon as possible and call the police. Your safety is of utmost priority!
My Parents Don't Want Me to Keep the Baby
Are you still a minor and pregnant? Do you feel unsure of what to think and feel right now — but your parents have quickly taken control and want to handle the situation by making you have an abortion?
Maybe things are happening too fast for you, or you would even like to keep the baby. It seems, however, that your wishes and considerations do not count.
You are probably still financially and legally dependent on your parents — which is expected at your age. You may be threatened with withdrawal of support or being kicked out if you don't comply. Especially young women who are dependent on others (e.g. parents, relatives, partners, employers, etc.) will find it tricky to escape this kind of pressure. Emotional manipulation can also be excruciating.
But even as a minor, neither your parents nor any other person may force you to have an abortion. THESE are the laws that apply to your situation ⬆️.
In the eyes of the law, your parents are no exception, nor is the child's father or any other person who may pressure you to have an abortion. They are all liable to prosecution for attempted coercion.
Knowing this will probably not make you lay charges.
You may still feel unsure of what you want, primarily because of your parents' reaction. Take the following test to discern the path you want to take.
🙎♀️Pregnant under 18: Do I have an abortion, or should I keep the baby?
Why Do Some Parents Respond That Way?
It is generally safe to assume that your parents are acting out of good intentions. Maybe they are stumped and see abortion as the only solution. Perhaps your gut instinct is telling you to follow a different path...
Take one step at a time to clarify your thoughts and desires and discover a path where heart and mind coincide.
- ⛑ Where do I go from here? — Quick Answers Quiz
ℹ️ Note: Parents often need time to warm up to the idea that you are expecting a baby. Their initial reaction need not dictate the final outcome.
Even if your parents do not come around, support is available for you to keep the baby. Teen mums who cannot continue living with their parents have the option of moving into supported living facilities. An abundance of resources is accessible to you.
📗 Our article Teenage Mum — Is This Doable? addresses possible options during pregnancy and after giving birth regarding housing, finances, schooling and more.
Abortion Coercion — If It Is Happening to You Right Now
Your situation is probably anything but easy as you wrestle with the pressure you are under while trying to make a good decision. Here is what you need to know:
- Your choice is legally protected. Abortions cannot be performed against your consent.
- Having someone to support you can help you strengthen your resolve. Can you think of anyone who would walk alongside you while giving you the freedom to discern which path to take?
- You may find it helpful to get some physical distance from the person pressuring you.
- Our free digital resources were created with your situation in mind. We want to be there for you as you discover your unique path. Why not give them a try?
- 📝 My situation: Abortion Pros and Cons Test
- 👥 How does my personality affect my parenting style? Personality Test
Our top picks for you:
Disclaimer:
This is intended as general legal information and education, not specific legal advice. Individual situations and regional laws vary. Contact a local attorney of your choice for specific legal advice.